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Designing Women They've created a way to juggle work and family BY RUTH SOLOMON STAFF WRITER In Lake County, you'll find shades of the "Designing Women" television show from a decade ago, starring Delta Burke, with one key difference. While that show, in its early stages, had one working mother, all the women who work for this Lake County start-up interior design firm are working mothers. All are in their 40s, three are married and three are divorced, and among the six of them, they have 17 children and one grandchild. These six women say they are lucky. They have found a place, "Collaborate Design Studio," where they can actually come close to achieving what is so difficult in many places of employment: They say they are actually able to balance work and family. Like many workplaces in which one employee functions as a de facto "mom" for her fellow co-workers, Tracey Rappaport Duffy of Vemon Hills serves that function at the Deerfield business. Duffy, who grew up in Deerfield, is the manager and co-owner of the business. ''We call her the glue. She holds us together," said Linda Eisenberg of Northbrook, a partner in the studio. "If we don't check in with her, we are all grounded," joked Cheryl Kling of Long Grove, another partner. The women said working at Collaborate Design Studio gives them flexibility so they can take time off to be with a sick child or watch their child compete on a water polo match, as Duffy tries to do regularly. ''We all decided to do this for the flexible hours, to have time for our families," said Duffy. Besides Duffy, Kling and Eisenberg, one other woman is a partner in Collaborate Design Studio, Christy Patterson of Gurnee. The studio also employs two other designers, Allie Swanson of Green Oaks and Cindi Schwarz of Gurnee. Not alone The women of Collaborate Design Studio are not alone in their desire or need to work outside the home. Nationwide, the percentage of mothers with children under the age of 18 who worked in the year 2000 was 73.6 percent, or 27.7 million mothers, compared with 96.1 percent for fathers with children that age, according to figures from the November 2000 monthly current population survey compiled by the Washington, D.C.-based Employment Policy Foundation. And as children grow up, the differences narrow, figures show . Also in 2000, more than one-third of all working households had dual earners, up from 9.5 percent in 1940. The percentage of single parents in the workforce has also risen, from 9.2 percent in 1940 to 15.9 percent in 2000. While many women work to increase family income, others work because they value the stimulation and status work confers on them. For example, Swanson, now divorced, said she absolutely had to find work for herself. "I decided to get out of the house to save my sanity," said Swanson, who received a degree from Harper College in Palatine when she was in her late 30s. Kling said the job suits her hectic life as the mother of a boy, 10, and two girls, ages 13 and 16. "Some of us come in earlier and some later," Kling said in a recent interview at their offices on 829 Waukegan Road in downtown Deerfleld. The office is in a quaint early 20th century two story wooden frame building that was once a single-family residence. Eisenberg, the mother of two sons, ages 12 and 16, and a 21-year-old daughter in college, said, ''We cover for each other. There are times we can't be here because of a family emergency." How often is that? ''With six women in their 40s, there is always a family emergency," Kling said. As an example, Duffy cited an incident a few weeks ago when Patterson was with a client and received a call that her daughter was in the hospital because of her asthma condition. "I met her daughter at the hospital until Christy (Patterson) could come," Duffy said. And the six women regularly coordinate their work schedules to accommodate their family needs. Last week was one such example, Duffy said. "Cheryl had an appointment with a client; Linda was at school for a meeting; Christy had an appointment with a client; and I had to take my child to the dentist." With Patterson and Kling covering, Eisenberg and Duffy could take care of their children, she said. Three of the women have had the chance to be stay-at-home mothers. Patterson was a 20-year stay-at-home mother until she returned to school and sought work because of a divorce, and Eisenberg stayed home for 13 years, returning to the work force five years ago. Swanson said she stayed home with-her two sons until they were ages 8 and 9. "I cherished being a stay-at-home mom. I had two boys one year apart. I took care of them and they were fun," she said. The other women have never been full-time stay-at-home moms. Schwarz said she has been working since she was 15 years old and Duffy said she has worked at least part-time for 20 years. Only one of the six women ever received any form of outside professional help in caring for their families, an au pair nanny in Eisenberg's family who cared for her three children, now ages 12, 16; and 21, for three or four years. "I have no family in the country," said Eisenberg, a native of Canada.
The hours do get harried. "I have left here at 3:30 p.m. and gotten home after 8 o'clock because I have been carpooling for five hours," said Kling.
But the women said they try to regularly sit down with their family for dinner, despite their busy schedules. "We have to have one family meal a week," said Patterson . Role models All six women had working mothers as role models, even while growing up in the 1960s when the norm was for women not to work outside the home. Schwarz said her mother was a nurse, going back to work when she was 7 and leaving young Cindi to be looked after by her older siblings. Patterson said her mother, the late Patricia Swanson, stayed at home until her children were grown, then went to work as a lobbyist, including advocating for human rights legislation. Swanson said her mother was a stay-at-home mom until Swanson was a teenager and then went to work full time after she divorced Swanson's father. Eisenberg's mother went to work when she was in first-grade. "I was a latch key kid," she said. Sometimes Eisenberg's brother watched her. "He had me cutting out car magazine cards," she recalled. Kling's mother started working when she was a teenager, while Duffy's mother worked as a substitute teacher, when she was older. The women said their children appear to have adjusted to their mothers' working, including becoming more responsible as a result of having to do more for themselves. ''My kids have become more independent than they were a few years ago. I can't always be there to help. I say 'You have to get your own car insurance'," said Patterson. Her ll-year-old daughter walks the dog every day and cleans her own room. Between work and family, the six women do squeeze in time for themselves. The trick appears to be to snag some quiet moments in the early hours. "The key for me is that 30 minutes with a cup of coffee and I am alone," said Kling. Time for exercise? Exercise also helps. But several of the women admitted their regular exercise programs have not been quite so regular since they started working. "Since I have gone back to work, I can't run as often," said Eisenberg who said she used to run six to eight miles regularly with a girlfriend. Kling said she had to time her morning workout with almost military-like percision, just after her three children leave for school at 7:55 a.m. the bus picks them up and then at 8 I leave," she said. "I am out the door, just like that." These designing women admit that all the running around from home to work can sometimes leave them on the verge of tears. ''We all have a melt down," Patterson said. But it helps to have five other friends with whom they work. ''We are like family. We all have the support of each other," Patterson said. Their experience contrasted with that in some corporate jobs, not always so family-friendly, some of the women said. "I remember flying to New York and they said, 'You have to stay overnight' and I said, Who is going to watch the kids?" Kling recalled. "They (some corporations) don't care about sick kids. But here we are all different, kind of like in a marriage," Eisenberg said. In fact, she added, "It is better than a marriage." Ruth Solmon can be reached at solomon@pioneerlocal.com Pioneer Press
Author: Ruth Solomon
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